[Alexei is and isn't at whatever attempts at unity are being made after the trial; he'll show up, occasionally, only to pace back out again before too long - never leaving the grounds, but not staying too close to any one place in particular with regards to the building.
His thoughts are many and varied, and in some ways he'd prefer to be alone with them; in other ways he's at least mildly aware that being left alone with his thoughts for long enough has historically never worked out well for anyone. Whether he actually expresses them or not, he would prefer to not be completely alone, but he finds that he has no interest in speaking to most at that gathering.
That's what brings him, in the end, to Room 17; the knock on the door is unhesitating but not demanding.]
[Schwann's been scarce since the trial ended. He's...never been good at consoling and comforting others in hard times, and he has a lot of his own thoughts to process, so he retired to his room early.
He's lying in bed with the lights off when he hears a knock. Blearily, he rises to his feet and flips the light back on before answering the door. Oh...]
[It sure is a thing, and it catches Schwann off guard. His mouth hangs slightly agape until he realizes he's just standing there and not saying anything.]
...No, of course not. I was just resting. [Something he can return to later.] Please, come in.
[He backs away from the door and offers Alexei his bed to sit on, or the vanity seat if he'd prefer that.]
I realize that the answer to this is obvious, but are you all right?
[Thank you for not just continuing to stare at him, Schwann, for fuck's sake.
...That isn't where he wants to direct his agitation, however, so he'll just. let it go for now. Come in. Take the vanity seat because taking the bed doesn't strike him well.]
...Not as poorly as many of the others seem to be, at any rate.
[Which he still does not seem to have figured out after all this time, that being comparatively all right does not mean that he is in fact all right.]
They're taking this hard, despite all the self-righteous anger earlier.
[Well, is there much point in pointing it out? He can gather that Alexei isn't all right, good enough.
He tentatively sits down at his bed, though instinct wants him to stand at the ready like he usually does around Alexei. It's his own room, it's...probably fine.]
Of course they are. A lot of them are just children, and it was a child that was slain. [He wasn't exactly happy about it either, but he sees what Alexei means in particular.] I could tell many of them have never even witnessed death before.
That much is clear. On the other hand, I sincerely hope their anger continues through to every person that dies here, because otherwise they're begging the question of acceptable victims.
[He gets it to some extent, but that doesn't mean he has to like it as a practice.]
My thoughts on this entire business won't matter come the end of the execution; I'll see to that much. The trial didn't strike me well.
[Ideally, no one else would be dying. But considering someone has already acted, there's no going back now. Alexei's not wrong in assuming there'll be more victims.
"Acceptable victims", though... Is Alexei even listening to himself?]
I...don't want them to become that complacent with this game either.
I find it likely that it will be to our detriment to dwell for long on any of this, since I have a hard time believing that the one doing all of this for the sake of hedonistic pleasure and little else will permit us much time to mourn our dead, or to handle our frustrations with the situation in any sort of meaningful way.
Perhaps he'll surprise me in that regard, but I don't have that much faith.
[So either you deal or you...don't, and if you don't that's just going to speed up the process inadvertently by making yourself a target. There are other concerns as well, personal things that he's not particularly interesting in voicing at the moment; he isn't interested in sorting through them, and as such they're better left behind where they belong.]
There isn't much to say, bluntly put. We knew this would happen eventually; I've done what I can to ensure that I can continue to live with myself, and for now that's going to have to be enough.
[It's frustrating on Schwann's end, too. It doesn't feel unwarranted, so being pushed back is just another reminder to himself that he's not here to concern himself with whatever Alexei's got going on and just follow along. He's always been content to do just that, but...man.]
[That seems to settle him, at least; not entirely, nowhere near entirely, but enough.]
Good. [It's quiet; he nods a bit to himself, reaffirming.] Good. The most we can do for the time being is remain steadfast. The deaths of those here are tragic, and they're regrettable, but that just makes it all the more important that we don't fail in finding a way through the situation.
I haven't either, though I don't imagine that will last long now that this has happened.
This will make the situation feel more...real, in a sense, to many of them. Something urgent, that shouldn't go ignored. [He rakes a hand back through the front of his hair; god.] Hopefully we'll last for a while; I'm sure it will happen again, as much as I don't want it to.
[And boy is Alexei right. Clues, clues everywhere.]
I can't see going back to the camaraderie we had before the first death. There's only going to be more attempts from here, especially since Hamelin has made it obvious that he is aware of our wishes. That part is very much real.
Then again, we're still relying on his ability to grant the wishes, which he has yet to do.
We ought to be grateful for the fact that he has yet to prove his ability to do so one way or another. Once he's verified that he can, there's not going to be any stopping what logically comes after.
Rest assured that I'm not delusional enough to believe that anything will stop this from happening again. My concern is more with the rate at which people die, as compared to how quickly we'll find a way to act against all of this.
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week 1 | post-trial
His thoughts are many and varied, and in some ways he'd prefer to be alone with them; in other ways he's at least mildly aware that being left alone with his thoughts for long enough has historically never worked out well for anyone. Whether he actually expresses them or not, he would prefer to not be completely alone, but he finds that he has no interest in speaking to most at that gathering.
That's what brings him, in the end, to Room 17; the knock on the door is unhesitating but not demanding.]
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He's lying in bed with the lights off when he hears a knock. Blearily, he rises to his feet and flips the light back on before answering the door. Oh...]
Alexei, sir. What can I do for you?
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[He doubts it, but the fact that he's bothering to ask instead of simply assuming that he isn't is sort of. ...It's a thing.]
Tonight has proven difficult. I found myself interested in hearing your thoughts.
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...No, of course not. I was just resting. [Something he can return to later.] Please, come in.
[He backs away from the door and offers Alexei his bed to sit on, or the vanity seat if he'd prefer that.]
I realize that the answer to this is obvious, but are you all right?
[It warrants asking anyway.]
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...That isn't where he wants to direct his agitation, however, so he'll just. let it go for now. Come in. Take the vanity seat because taking the bed doesn't strike him well.]
...Not as poorly as many of the others seem to be, at any rate.
[Which he still does not seem to have figured out after all this time, that being comparatively all right does not mean that he is in fact all right.]
They're taking this hard, despite all the self-righteous anger earlier.
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[Well, is there much point in pointing it out? He can gather that Alexei isn't all right, good enough.
He tentatively sits down at his bed, though instinct wants him to stand at the ready like he usually does around Alexei. It's his own room, it's...probably fine.]
Of course they are. A lot of them are just children, and it was a child that was slain. [He wasn't exactly happy about it either, but he sees what Alexei means in particular.] I could tell many of them have never even witnessed death before.
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[He gets it to some extent, but that doesn't mean he has to like it as a practice.]
My thoughts on this entire business won't matter come the end of the execution; I'll see to that much. The trial didn't strike me well.
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"Acceptable victims", though... Is Alexei even listening to himself?]
I...don't want them to become that complacent with this game either.
[As for the second bit:]
What do you mean?
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Perhaps he'll surprise me in that regard, but I don't have that much faith.
[So either you deal or you...don't, and if you don't that's just going to speed up the process inadvertently by making yourself a target. There are other concerns as well, personal things that he's not particularly interesting in voicing at the moment; he isn't interested in sorting through them, and as such they're better left behind where they belong.]
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[It's either move on or be left behind, and you don't want to be left behind in a situation like this.
It's awful.]
I know you wanted to hear my thoughts on this, but if you think speaking yours while they matter may help...
[He's always been there to listen, and now is no different.]
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As long as you're certain, then I understand.
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He's quiet for a moment, just taking a moment to breathe through his frustration and not let himself be too openly irritated.]
...You don't need to direct your concern toward me, you know. It's appreciated, but in the end it's unwarranted.
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I understand.
[He repeats, more firmly this time.]
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Good. [It's quiet; he nods a bit to himself, reaffirming.] Good. The most we can do for the time being is remain steadfast. The deaths of those here are tragic, and they're regrettable, but that just makes it all the more important that we don't fail in finding a way through the situation.
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Yes. The difficult part is making those first steps. I haven't heard much from the others in terms of clues.
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This will make the situation feel more...real, in a sense, to many of them. Something urgent, that shouldn't go ignored. [He rakes a hand back through the front of his hair; god.] Hopefully we'll last for a while; I'm sure it will happen again, as much as I don't want it to.
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I can't see going back to the camaraderie we had before the first death. There's only going to be more attempts from here, especially since Hamelin has made it obvious that he is aware of our wishes. That part is very much real.
Then again, we're still relying on his ability to grant the wishes, which he has yet to do.
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