[In any other context, he can't see himself taking the revelation regarding the full scale of Alexei's plan well. He would've wanted to find a way out of it, once and for all.]
I've been dead this entire time for you, then.
[Schwann, that is.
His other hand reaches out as both clasp Alexei's.]
I wish I had known then what I do now. I...don't know what this means for us, if you get the chance to return. But please know that it wouldn't turn out that way every time.
How many times do I have to tell you not to worry about me like this?
[He lets Schwann take his hands, though; his grip is fairly tight, despite his words, and the chastising itself is gentle.]
I won't say that it will be an easy process. But if you get the opportunity... If we bring you back, and you can find a way back to where you came from, I'm sure you can change things. Orchestrate a more favorable outcome.
[He's okay with his own personal outcome being some weird, splintered thing that fails to happen, if it comes to that.]
[The sigh that Schwann exhales is one of relief but also agitation, like he wants to somehow get past the bars and gently shake Alexei.]
You try listening to yourself and not find any of it concerning.
[But since he can't do that, he just squeezes Alexei's hands right back.]
I still find it very difficult to imagine going back now and not sharing memories with you and Yeager. But...if you manage to bring me back and that is my only option, then I will. I'll be there for you this time, no matter how much you try to keep me locked out. We'll figure things out together.
[Listen, he has something that's maybe an idea right now, with regards to a possible solution. But he'd have to talk to Yeager about it first, among other things.]
...Very well.
[He'll approach again, though he still seems a bit off; despite what's been said here tonight, he's trying so hard to not have any sort of Incident over what's happening. He can be upset later, on his own time.
[It's really nothing so complicated. If Alexei wants to have his Incident later, Schwann...has relented on that.]
I just wanted to be near you while you're still here.
[He doesn't know how much longer Alexei plans to stay, and although he doesn't want to make this out to be the last of their possible time to spend together, he has to keep the worst case scenario in mind too. Might as well make the most of it.]
[Alexei. The straightforwardness of that reply makes Schwann laugh...and blink back any emotion that might be springing from it. His hands are occupied at the moment.]
I can't make you stay the entire night. You need to sleep.
Heh. All right, then I respectfully request that you at least sleep somewhere that isn't the dungeon floor.
[His smile softens considerably at the next bit. Alexei's...not wrong that things at the beginning were definitely more out of obligation than anything. But they wouldn't be in this position if things hadn't changed.]
I'm glad to hear that. [...] And despite how things turned out, I'm grateful to have had the opportunity to spend time with you here. From the sound of things, we might not ever have been able to get this far if it weren't for being brought here.
[Which sounds silly to say when he's standing in a cell, awaiting his death. But it doesn't negate all of the truly good things that happened.]
Yeah, I can imagine...especially when I was brought here while being Raven.
[He did get his uniform back but it felt too awkward putting it on, especially in the beginning. It was just easier to not make the physical shift between Raven and Schwann...until last night, of course.
As for that last bit...he nods.]
I'll be back at your side before you know it.
[The "if I manage to make it back" is obviously implied, but remains unsaid. They both know that caveat anyway.]
...he reaches up to gently touch his chest like he still isn't sure if his blastia is acting up again or if Alexei was actually just that charming just now. Eventually he lets out a small, amused sigh before redirecting his attention to Alexei.]
Thank you again, for...all of this.
[For carrying on despite everything, and for giving him something to look forward to going into what is to come.]
[His gaze darts to that spot he knows the blastia to be, and for a good moment it's clear that he doesn't know what to do with his face; thankfully, the words give him something else to focus on.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[In any other context, he can't see himself taking the revelation regarding the full scale of Alexei's plan well. He would've wanted to find a way out of it, once and for all.]
I've been dead this entire time for you, then.
[Schwann, that is.
His other hand reaches out as both clasp Alexei's.]
I wish I had known then what I do now. I...don't know what this means for us, if you get the chance to return. But please know that it wouldn't turn out that way every time.
no subject
[He lets Schwann take his hands, though; his grip is fairly tight, despite his words, and the chastising itself is gentle.]
I won't say that it will be an easy process. But if you get the opportunity... If we bring you back, and you can find a way back to where you came from, I'm sure you can change things. Orchestrate a more favorable outcome.
[He's okay with his own personal outcome being some weird, splintered thing that fails to happen, if it comes to that.]
no subject
You try listening to yourself and not find any of it concerning.
[But since he can't do that, he just squeezes Alexei's hands right back.]
I still find it very difficult to imagine going back now and not sharing memories with you and Yeager. But...if you manage to bring me back and that is my only option, then I will. I'll be there for you this time, no matter how much you try to keep me locked out. We'll figure things out together.
no subject
I'd imagine we don't have many other options. As it is, that's...enough for me, I think.
[This is so grossly complicated? And there's no way to uncomplicate things without causing a horrific amount of logistics problems.]
I would prefer it if we could all remember all of this; of course I would. But if that isn't an option, I trust you with this.
no subject
It...really is complicated, though. Alexei has always been the smart one, so if even he's not sure how to work it all out, then...
Well, they can worry about it more if the time comes. When the time comes.]
Your trust won't be unfounded, should that be how things must come to pass.
[Even if it ends up involving a lot of legitimate shaking. After all of this, he's not going to hold back anymore.]
...Why don't you come back over here, now?
no subject
...Very well.
[He'll approach again, though he still seems a bit off; despite what's been said here tonight, he's trying so hard to not have any sort of Incident over what's happening. He can be upset later, on his own time.
Did you want something, or...]
no subject
I just wanted to be near you while you're still here.
[He doesn't know how much longer Alexei plans to stay, and although he doesn't want to make this out to be the last of their possible time to spend together, he has to keep the worst case scenario in mind too. Might as well make the most of it.]
no subject
[Alexei.]
I'll stay as long as you want me to.
no subject
I can't make you stay the entire night. You need to sleep.
...Thank you, though.
no subject
[listen...]
...I've no doubt that it was at least partially through obligation, at the beginning. But you've been good to me since we arrived here.
Thank you for that.
no subject
[His smile softens considerably at the next bit. Alexei's...not wrong that things at the beginning were definitely more out of obligation than anything. But they wouldn't be in this position if things hadn't changed.]
I'm glad to hear that. [...] And despite how things turned out, I'm grateful to have had the opportunity to spend time with you here. From the sound of things, we might not ever have been able to get this far if it weren't for being brought here.
[Which sounds silly to say when he's standing in a cell, awaiting his death. But it doesn't negate all of the truly good things that happened.]
no subject
[He isn't altogether sure when things changed entirely; he couldn't pinpoint it if asked. But the fact is that things are different now.]
If you find yourself truly grateful for it, then I won't argue with you about it. Just...be sure you return to me.
no subject
[He did get his uniform back but it felt too awkward putting it on, especially in the beginning. It was just easier to not make the physical shift between Raven and Schwann...until last night, of course.
As for that last bit...he nods.]
I'll be back at your side before you know it.
[The "if I manage to make it back" is obviously implied, but remains unsaid. They both know that caveat anyway.]
no subject
[It's just a matter of figuring out how to do this without causing an uncontrollable amount of stupid repercussions.]
I dislike the idea of being reunited with you only to have to resign myself to never seeing you again. I'll have a solution, next time you see me.
no subject
Rather than dealing with that tight feeling in his chest, Schwann opts to tease Alexei a little.]
Do you realize how sappy that sounded? [It doesn't stop him from grinning.] I wouldn't expect anything less from the genius Commandant, though.
no subject
[He doesn't really, not from the sound of it.]
Fortunately enough for you, I don't give up easily.
no subject
[He wouldn't be here today otherwise.
...he reaches up to gently touch his chest like he still isn't sure if his blastia is acting up again or if Alexei was actually just that charming just now. Eventually he lets out a small, amused sigh before redirecting his attention to Alexei.]
Thank you again, for...all of this.
[For carrying on despite everything, and for giving him something to look forward to going into what is to come.]
no subject
...You can thank me when all of this is over.